Field Trip Trauma

Today was the annual end of the year field trip to the Animal Farm for Lou's school. 

Of course it's been raining all week, making the already muddy farm even muddier, and creating puddles so large and delicious even I could hardly resist them.  Needless to say, everyone was soaked by the time we finally made it back to the parking lot, and the relief I felt when I saw my car and knew that I had the freedom to just leave was immeasurable.

But this thought occurred to me as I was wrangling stray children and herding them towards our tour guide: why is it that the only parents who came along are the parents of the children who don't need them there?  I know that if I were to send Lou on the field trip alone she would behave herself.  Sure, she'd still be a three year old, but she'd come back when you ask her to, she wouldn't barge into the barn if you told the kids not to, and she wouldn't push, shove, hit, bite, bicker with, bother, or in general harass everyone else.  Same could be said for the children of the other five parents who came along.

The kids you really dread taking out in public, those are the kids who are allowed to go on field trips sans-parent.  Why is that?  If my kid were half the problem that some of these other ones were, I would be too embarassed to leave her alone with others. 

Actually this lack of parent is probably why these kids are the way they are, but I'm trying to be non-judgemental here (not an easy feat for me as many of you know).

Are these parents that desperate for a break that they need an entire week of mornings off from their child, no matter the circumstance?  That they're willing to let their children traumatize other parents?  It's bad enough that the teacher knows what your kid's really like, are you sure you want everyone else to as well?  Maybe just living with such a whirlwind clouds the senses and dulls the part of the brain used for rational judgement.  Clearly, some of these parents weren't thinking when they dropped their tired crab-monster off at school with a bag lunch and sped back to the comfort of their couch. 

Honestly, if your kid is three, four, or five years old, then this field trip, one of only two the whole year, is a pretty big deal and if you're not working, then what's your excuse for not being there?  Why wouldn't you want to be there to take pictures and be in the loop when your kid starts retelling the field trip at dinner?

I'm not a parenting expert, but it seems to me that mostly what these frenzied maniacs want is for someone to listen to them.  They talk incessantly, and if it gets on your nerves, then try listening to it for a while.  Kids are more likely to shut up and take a break if they know that you'll listen when then open their mouths again.  They push because it makes you pay attention, and they run off just to see if you'll care enough to go get them.     

Problem is, that when it's not your kid, the knee-jerk reaction to a kid who's been nothing but a bully all day and shoves yours is to slap her across the face. 

I'm still debating whether or not that would've been a good idea.  Sure I'd probably feel pretty low right now, and true, it wouldn't be setting the best of examples for Lou, but if she's made it to the age of five and no one has yet taught her that that's just not acceptable, then maybe, in some ways, I'd be doing her a favor by teaching her. 

The point is, I can't parent your kid.  Neither can any of the other parents who came along, and Lord help the teacher who has to see that child every day.  I know, it's exhauting having a high-intensity kid, believe me.  But this is your high intensity kid, so get used to it, and start taking some control over the situation and both of your lives.  Even just pretending you're in charge can do wonders- for your self-esteem and your kid.  Try it sometime.  You just might find that being around your child isn't that big of a chore and maybe next time you'll tag along on the field trip.

Unless your kid is the shover.  Better to just cut your losses now and admit defeat.

I'm kidding!

Kind of.